devon ramen

Dear absent father,
Why weren’t you ever there? Why won’t you ever be there? Why did you knock my mother up and just leave us? Do you think about me? I think about you.
I think about you almost every day. When other girls are talking about how their daddies ruined their date with a boy they like and I think about how you’ll never try to talk to me about boys. I thought about you when all of the girls in elementary school were talking about the daddy-daughter dance and how I couldn’t go.
My mother says I look like you, sometimes. That I have your hair, or your nose and I wonder what I don’t have of yours.
My mother says I act like you when I do something wrong, but what about when I do something right? Am I like you then, too?
Do you ever wonder about me? I wonder about you. 

This is so sad :/
devon ramen

(no subject)

 You know how life decisions come to you in the shower? It’s the time when you actually have a moment just for yourself, and you start to think about what’s important in your life at the moment.

I’ve been bouncing around different areas of interest in Psychology. I wanted to work in schools to become a counsellor for adolescents, then I jumped to doing Psychology in an area of Business (Human resources….. YUCK), then I decided to deal with just with pre-school aged children. I’ve changed my mind yet again!

People always ask me where I’m planning to work after I graduate. Do I go back home, or do I travel the world?

Of course I want to travel, but there’s something more important to me, and that is to help raise awareness on mental health in my own country. There are too many hidden cases of abused children and abused women, that are not disclosed in the media and instead, kept hush-hush. Which I find completely disgusting and morally WRONG.

Victims of abuse already feel personal shame for what they have gone through, so WHY THE FUCK is the government encouraging this self-guilt??? The government should be the voice of the people and bring to light the ugly truth. The government should realise it is NOT their fault that abuse is happening in the country… it’s a problem within the individual themselves.

And yes, as you may have guessed, I want to work with victims of abuse, in particular children and women, back at home. Nobody is speaking out for them. There are no centres dedicated to helping them. There are no shelters. They can’t turn to anyone or anything.

Basically, every institution in the country (family, schools, religion, the government) is telling them to shut up and sit down.

I’m gonna tell them to stand up and speak out :)
devon ramen

(no subject)

i just realised there have been a few people who have added me as a friend. if you insist on adding me, please comment here (so i know to check and add you back). otherwise, i dont really blog here. please see my tumblr for my public blog :)
devon ramen

(no subject)

Everyone has their own struggle. Everyone is trying to cope. I have my struggles.

I struggle with my family. I struggle with my dad being gone. i struggle with my sister growing up without a father to be loved by. I struggle with my brother living without a father, a role model. I struggle with my sister not feeling loved or cared for. I struggle with my brother’s blurry dreams. I struggle with trying to live up to my father’s expectations. I struggle with my mother not having a companion. I struggle with her loneliness and sadness. I struggle with her believing she is not deserving of joy. I struggle with her half-hearted smile and her crinkled eyes. I struggle with her hopeless tears, her desperate pleads, her isolated screams. I struggle with her aging, with her fading, with her leaving. I struggle with the idea of death, the same one that ate my grandfathers and my father, the same one that has caught my mother. I struggle with my family. I struggle with this empty hole in our family.

I struggle.

devon ramen

Iran, people of the world are watching

If you are reading this right now, you have more luxury than someone in Iran could ever hope for right now. If you are watching TV or a video on youtube, updating your status on Facebook, Tweeting, or even texting your friend, you are lucky. If you are safe in your home, and were able to sleep last night without the sounds of screaming from the rooftops, you need to know and understand what is happening to people just like you in Iran right now.

They are not the enemy. They are a people whose election has been stolen. For the first time in a long time, a voice for change struck the youth of Iran, just as it did for many people in the United States only seven months ago. Hossein Mousavi gained the support of millions of people in Iran as a Presidential candidate. He stands for progressiveness. He supports good relations with the West, and the rest of the world. He is supported with fervor as he challenges the oppressive regime of Mahmoud Ahmadinejad.

On Friday, millions of people waited for hours in line to vote in Iran's Presidential election. Later that night, as votes came in, Mousavi was alerted that he was winning by a two-thirds margin. Then there was a change. Suddenly, it was Ahmadinejad who had 68% of the vote - in areas which have been firmly against his political party, he overwhelmingly won. Within three hours, millions of votes were supposedly counted - the victor was Ahmadinejad. Immediately fraud was suspected - there was no way he could have won by this great a margin with such oppposition. Since then, reports have been coming in of burned ballots, or in some cases numbers being given without any being counted at all. None of this is confirmed, but what happened next seems to do the trick.

The people of Iran took the streets and rooftops. They shout "Death to the dictator" and "Allah o akbar." They join together to protest. Peacefully. The police attack some, but they stay strong. Riots happen, and the shouting continues all night. Text messaging was disabled, as was satellite, and websites which can spread information such as Twitter, Facebook, Youtube, and the BBC are blocked in the country. At five in the morning, Arabic speaking soldiers (the people of Iran speak Farsi) stormed a university in the capital city of Tehran. While sleeping in their dormitories, five students were killed. Others were wounded. These soldiers are thought to have been brought in by Ahmadinejad from Lebanon. Today, 192 of the university's faculty have resigned in protest.

Mousavi requested that the government allow a peaceful rally to occur this morning - the request was denied. Many thought that it would not happen. Nevertheless, first a few thousand people showed up in the streets of Tehran. At this point, it is estimated that 1 to 2 million people were there. Mousavi spoke on the top of a car. The police stood by. For a few hours, everything was peaceful. Right now, the same cannot be said. Reports of injuries, shootings, and killings are flooding the internet. Twitter has been an invaluable source - those in Iran who still know how to access it are updating regularly with picture evidence. People are being brutally beaten. Tonight will be another night without rest for so many in Iran no older than I am. Tonight there is a Green Revolution.

For more information:
here and here
Here - near constant updates
Here - ONTD_political live post
@StopAhmadi, @IranElection09, @persiankiwi, @NextRevolution, @Change_for_Iran

دنیارابگوییدچطورآنهاانتخاباتمان دزدیده اند
Tell the world how they have stolen our election

- original post by one_hoopy_frood
devon ramen

(no subject)

so my dear friend's mother just passed away yesterday. al-fatihah.. i haven't spoken to my friend is ages because we drifted apart. i talked to her mum a few times though and it saddens me to the bone that her mother has left her and her younger brother at such a young age. what makes it even worse is that their father passed away when she was only a little girl. i have no idea how to comfort her, but i feel compelled to. i don't know how to explain it... should i say she's in a better place? it's god's will? god has better plans? even if i myself might not believe it, i would say those things if those words would mean anything to her.. but i know it won't mean a single thing. when a mother's gone, a mother's gone and there's nothing you can say to make it alright.

why does shit have to happen? how can somebody justify two young children having their parents taken away like that?

who would've thought, when i talked to her mother five years ago, that she wouldn't be here today? life is too precious to be cut short. so why does it have to be? and so unexpectedly, too?
devon ramen

a moment of clarity.

you are your own person. not the half of another. you’re not someone’s heart or eye or limb. you are your own and only yours. you may not be talented but you’ve been gifted with the ability to have your own thoughts, ideas, and dreams. think those thoughts and live those dreams, no matter what another person says or thinks. they’re your dreams, and without dreams you dont have much. and you’ll hate yourself for always wondering why. the first person to love is you, so put yourself first above anything. everything else is just: a variable. they have their own life and shit to deal with. they come and go. you’re known yourself since you were a child to a teenager and as long as you will live. but others move on with whatever their lives bring them. you’re your own constant and therefore the answer to your own equation.

don’t forget you.

some people just need reminding.